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It is Eastertime. My favorite character at Eastertime whom I’d like to consider a “friend” is Thomas. Prefixed to his name almost always is the adjective “doubting”. He doubted because he was hurting. The first time he met the Risen Lord was one week after Easter. At that meeting, two wounded men met. The first wounded man was Jesus. He met the apostles and showed them His wounds. It sounded like Jesus showed them His wounds with an element of pride. Aptly so, because those wounds were not wounds of defeat. They were wounds of love. They were wounds of victory and triumph. They were not aching wounds. They were not stinking wounds. They were wounds of glory. They were wounds of love. A love that is ready to sacrifice without measure. He showed them His hands and His side. He did that not to rebuke or to accuse. He did that to show them the depth of His tender love.
The other wounded man was Thomas. He did not have wounds on his skin. He had no bleeding wounds on his flesh. His wounds were from within. His heart was wounded by disappointment. He felt deceived by the Master. He felt defeated after having staked everything in Jesus. He thought Jesus was the Messiah. He thought Jesus was King. He questioned why Jesus died like a criminal. He thought Jesus would save Israel. Why could He not even save Himself from His oppressors? Thomas was disappointed. He felt duped. He was almost fully convinced that he made the wrong decision in following this carpenter from Galilee. He really had a deep and gaping wound within.
The wounds of the heart take longer to heal. They take longer to heal because we can hide and pretend that they do not exist. We can talk and act and move along as if there were nothing wrong or lacking inside of us. Some of us can walk around feeling wounded and beaten for years without our closest friends even noticing or seeing through the “masks” we conveniently wear as we go through our suffering. Not for long though. Sooner or later, we begin to fall into severe self-pity and think that our friends are too great or too busy to listen to our small heartaches and inner wounds. Later, we even think they are insensitive for not detecting our woundedness and offering us the balm we secretly seek and crave for.
At Eastertime, two wounded men met. The first one had glorious wounds. The second one had gaping, aching wounds inside of him. The first one was ready to heal by the power of His wounds. The second one needed healing for his wounds but he had nobody to heal him. They met. The first one healed the second. At the end of the meeting, both of them had glorious wounds, ready to heal more wounds. Thousands are wounded around us. Some carry secret anger against unfaithful spouses. Some carry anger against officemates who sow intrigues and spread gossip. Some carry secret anger and resentment because of problems of decades ago that were not faced squarely and resolved openly. Some carry that “tampo” and “sama ng loob” which originated when they were children or teenagers. These could be a priest or a nun in school or against a former girlfriend or boyfriend who was untruthful. Oh, there are so many of them! I listen to them everyday. Each of us meet so many everyday. They are as many as the stars in the sky.
Unfortunately, even if we try to mask our deep-seated anger and resentments, the human person has a way of seeking some kind of expression. This is the psyche’s war of bringing back some lost balance or equilibrium. These resentments, thoughts of revenge and resisting actuations begin to take different forms. They are sometimes expressed as sarcasm or irritability or insecurity. The point is that truly wounded people cannot hide behind masks for long. If they succeed in fooling others for sometime, sometimes, they cannot fool themselves for a long time, all the time. Inner wounds are too painful to bear. These people need healing. If given a choice, they all want to touch the wounds of Christ. They want to know for sure that someone loves them enough to be wounded and maybe even killed for love of them. The problem is they cannot see Christ anymore. They can only see the so-called Christians. They only see people who claim to carry the name of Christ. The question is: Are they really like Christ? Do they really live their lives as Christ did or prescribed? Are the Christians today wounded enough in the name of love that they can heal those who are wounded by selfishness? Are our Christians of today wounded in such a way that allows them to heal those who are wounded? Are our Christians truly risen from the death of indifference and antipathy that they can resurrect shattered hopes and bring back lost and broken dreams?
The world needs Christ. If the world cannot see Christ in the Christians of today, they will walk away from God, carrying with them hearts heavy and bleeding with un healed wounds. And as they walk away, with heads bowed down, they will only have one thought in mind: God is dead.
WOUNDED PEOPLE
Jesus Our Light